You were one of the naysayers. When friends asked what you’d do to survive the zombie apocalypse, you scoffed. “Like that would ever happen,” you’d say, and then wonder why on earth you were friends with these crazy doomsayers.
Even when the Center for Disease Control issued a statement about preparing for a zombie attack, you thought it was only a joke. But now it’s happened—like really happened. Weird infectious virus and everything, just like the experts said. And guess what? Your built-up inventory of snorts and eyerolls isn’t going to help you.
But lucky for you, you have a storage unit.
Of course, I’m being serious. Think about it—what do you keep in there? The extra mattress from the guest bedroom, an old TV and living room set, your out-of-season clothes, and maybe even a radio and your mini fridge from college. In other words, almost everything you’ll need to hole up for a few months while this whole zombie thing works itself out. With any luck, you’ll also have a baseball bat or two from when you cleared out the shed—it’ll come in handy if you come across any zombies.
On top of practically having a small, second apartment at your disposal, your storage unit is also ideal when it comes to security against zombies. The often out-of-the-way location lessens your chance of encountering any of the undead, and the complex layout of the facility will just confuse them—especially if your unit is buried somewhere in the middle of the maze. The lack of windows and metal or concrete walls in the storage unit mean that the only way in is through the door. But you’ve got that triple-padlocked, anyway. And hey, if those zombies try to break in, you’ve got shovels, hedge trimmers, and chainsaws from that time you cleaned your garage. Kill away, my friends!
All you really need now is food, water, and a few other supplies. Maybe your friends will be generous and help you out with that. I mean, you’re the one who didn’t prepare, after all.